Ambiguous White

Before I woke, I dreamed that the alarm on my new cell phone failed to go off again and I missed my professionalism class this morning. Today I'm assigned to take the role of "Ms. Niceperson" and explain why I do or don't have an ethical duty to tell an opposing lawyer they will lose their case if they don't file something correctly when said lawyer calls me from out of town to ask for an extension because their father has had a stroke. In my dream, after I miss the class, my professor sends me an email telling me how unprofessional my missing class was.



My alarm goes off. And soggy whiteness covers everything outside my window. An ambiguous white. Thick slush covers the grass, a thaw seems imminent and as I can hear cars driving at a rather steady pace up Taylors Ferry I am not entirely sure that I may safely bury my head back into my pillow. Ambiguity quickly melds into guilt, as my determination to drive up the hill for a cup of coffee takes hold. For if I possess the confidence to drive up the hill to Starbucks, I have necessarily eradicated my excuse to miss class, no? I decide to settle that after I get the coffee.



Things look up as snow flakes fly into my windshield. Better still, while no problems arise on the main road, the turn lane and parking lot remain obstructed.



Home, and I check my email. Alas, Martha Spence, head something or rather of the law school, has not written to tell us that there will be no school. On to the college home pageand the verdict isSNOW ADVISORY, no school until noon! And I'm saved.



Again and again and again: I love this city.

Great Networking Opportunity!!!

I have decided that my least favorite word of the year, and maybe even the decade, is "networking." As in the email I just received with the subject line reading "Great Networking Opportunity!" from Career Services (which I quickly deleted without opening). Really, the phrase "Great Networking Opportunity" seems like quite enough: does it really require a fucking exclamation point?!

Mint green Xeroxes announcing "great networking opportunities" have fallen from the sky like the shit of ten thousand migrating birds since I started law school. Some cultures consider getting shat on by a bird to be an auspicious omen. To me, being shat on by a bird feels a lot more like spilling my morning coffee all over a white shirt (never mind that I just knew that would happen when I wore it).

Nasty "networking opportunity" stains of things I should want to do to advance my career and won't do because I despise schmoozing.

So yeah, next time you want to ruffle my feathers, just say "networking." Better yet, title your next Birthday Evite a "Great Networking Opportunity." Sounds like fun!