I have decided that my least favorite word of the year, and maybe even the decade, is "networking." As in the email I just received with the subject line reading "Great Networking Opportunity!" from Career Services (which I quickly deleted without opening). Really, the phrase "Great Networking Opportunity" seems like quite enough: does it really require a fucking exclamation point?!
Mint green Xeroxes announcing "great networking opportunities" have fallen from the sky like the shit of ten thousand migrating birds since I started law school. Some cultures consider getting shat on by a bird to be an auspicious omen. To me, being shat on by a bird feels a lot more like spilling my morning coffee all over a white shirt (never mind that I just knew that would happen when I wore it).
Nasty "networking opportunity" stains of things I should want to do to advance my career and won't do because I despise schmoozing.
So yeah, next time you want to ruffle my feathers, just say "networking." Better yet, title your next Birthday Evite a "Great Networking Opportunity." Sounds like fun!
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