Or maybe "Wet Nose, Warm Heart"!

You know you love your dog when you have a pair of jeans permanently hanging on a hook to dry because he will get a real walk, rain or shine, whether he likes the rain or not. Speaking of which, isn’t it sad that I would probably make more money off a book of bullshit phrases like that one entitled You Know You Love Your Dog When… than I ever will as a second rate lawyer? I could even put out bumper stickers just like that god awful Dog Is My Copilot book everyone assumes you want for Christmas when you have a dog. A word to the wise: just because someone has a dog, even an annoyingly cute dog some people might like to dress up, doesn’t mean that that person wants a feel good book about how pet ownership saved their soul or another pug calendar. Not that I know anyone like that.